I remember my husband coming home after taking our taxes in to be done and telling me that his tax preparation gal had told him that one more child would get us a bigger return. Well......who's not in for more money~after all, we only had 2 girls at that time~why not?! So that night in March we threw caution to the wind and well........miracle #1~we were pregnant. I'm not one of those gals that gets sick so all went very smooth~until we had our retuine untrasound at 20 weeks~when they did the scan of the babies kidneys they had found that there was a problem. One of her kidneys looked different~they called it a renal pelves. Nothing could be done with it~just time to tell~at that stage in her development things could still grow~and the doctor assuered me that it might have been the scaning equipment as well was not picking up things correctly. So it was a waiting game. She would need a ultrasound after birth to check on the development of things. Later that same year in September~it was a Monday night (WWE Wresting was on) I took a nice hot bath~well....not a great plan. lol When I got down stairs and went to settle into my spot on the couch I twisted my leg to sit and out pooped my knee cap. I started to cry/scream as my husband sat watching wrestling a few feet away~once her realized that something was wrong we tried to get me moved so my knee might go back into place. No such luck, but luck would have it that my doctor only lived a few blocks away~not so lucky was the fact that he was on ER duty that night!! So we call 911 and had an ambulance come pick my very pregnate self up and take me to the doctor. It became a emergancy when I could no longer feel my foot~when my knee cap went out it pinched other nerves~including the one to my foot~as I started turning blue the EMT's made the call to get me in ASAP. Longest ride across town with bumpy side streets!! lol Once there I saw my doctor~long story short they gave me enough meds to put down a elephant (I have a very high pain tolerence) and grabbed my leg and yanked and there we went back into place. :) So I had to take it easy~the extra weight was not easy on my knee~and the fact that I had a 2 year old and was a stay at home mom made it impossible. The rest of my pregnancy went smooth until October 28th.
It was1:10 a.m.~it was a Saturday morning,(3 of my 4 girls were born on Saturdays!?) when I was sleeping in bed and BAM....my water broke. I was 37 weeks and 2 days pregnant~this was too early and I knew it. I went down to the bathroom to make sure it wasn't jsut me having "issues" So I walked around the house and petted the cat for the next 50 minutes until I began to feel some contractions. I knew this was the real deal so it was time to start making plans for the kiddo's. Woke the husband up~who thought I was joking!! Called my dad who was of course sleeping~went into the hospital where he later met us. It was a very loooong process compared to my 2 prior births. (6 hours each) We stalled out at 7 cm. for a long while and after hours of walking down the hall way it was no use. I begged for them to just do a C-section but they knew that's not what I wanted. So we just took a break and let me rest~now the entire time durning this labor I had spiked a fever which in it's self was an issue. I was given high doses of Tylenol to help bring it down. After 15 hours of labor (drug FREE) my Grace Lynne was finally born at 4:23 p.m.(the doctor joked that her name should be Patience)~she was a good sized baby for 37 weeks~but I was terrified that there was something wrong with her~she didn't cry when she was born. They cleaned her mouth out with suction and she started to whimper a bit~which made me feel a little better. They came over and handed me this perfect little girl with huge big blue eyes and I selflessly handed her to my husband~I thought I would have all night with this little angel. lol They gave him a minute then took her to the nursery for testing. They said they would clean her and bring her back within the hour. Well~that hour took several and the doctor finally came back in and explained that she would be spending some time under the oxgyen hood~she was having a very hard time breathing. She wasn't able to keep her lungs open when she breathed~they stuck together like a wet balloon so they were ginving her extra oxgyen to help inflate them. They also were trying to get a central iv in to give her antibotic's in fear that my temp. was the sign of an infection. They were having no success with the iv ~finally they were able to get on in her umbilical cord. By this time my family and husband had gone home leaving me a sobbing mess in my room. Around midnight the nurse came in with a wheelchair and took me to see my angel. It was one of the scarest things I had seen~but little did I know it by far wasn't the worst in this journey. She was perfect in every other sense~had brown hair~perfect little fingers and toes~I could look past the iv's and little bubble her head was under~she was PERFECT to me. After an hour the nurse made me go back in my room for some sleep~afterall it was 24 hours that I had been awake. She was fairly certain that things would be looking up in the morning~but there was a small chance that she would need to be taken to a larger hospital that could handle things better. I went to sleep that night praying so hard that things would look up.
No one even checked in on me that night~if they did I slept through it. lol I woke up in the morning with a renewed mind~took a shower and got dressed and put my makeup on. Feeling like the day was already better. The nurse came in the room and asked me if my doctor had been into talk to me about the transfer yet. I was confused.......I asked her what she meant and she quickly paged the doctor. When he came into the room I could feel something was up~he explained to me that things weren't improving the way they would like so they had talked to a neighboring hospital and they were sending an ambulance to get Grace and take her there for further care. Now mind you I was again alone~tried to call my husband and he had taken the girls out for breakfast~my dad wasn't answering the phone. My step-sister came to visit~as she walked into the room she saw me crying and knew something was wrong. I just kept saying that they are taking her away. I remember standing in the nursery by her side in the incubator waiting for them to come~numb to what was happening. When the team walked through the door it became real. They hooked and unhooked machines up as I stood there sobbing~my heart was breaking~this was not supposed to happen. They took her away, I stood and watched them go down the hallway until I couldn't see anymore shadows. I was taken back to my room where I broke down. My husband finally came in and I filled him in on what was going on~my sister had talked to my dad so everyone was filled in. The doctor had come in and out explaining to us what was happening~I pretty much had made up my mind that I was not staying in the hospital without her~I was leaving. They didn't object~after lunch we were checked out and on our way to tell our parents the plan.
We first went to my parents house then we went to my in-laws and let them know~we made plans with them to come to the hospital to visit with her. We didn't know for sure that she was going to be ok~we wanting everyone to meet her while they still could. We arrived at the hospital at 4:00 p.m. to see Grace for really the first time. At that time she had a c-pap in her nose to help her breathe~she was now breathing too fast which they needed to slow down. There was a strange calm while we were there~although I later learned that while I visited her breathing became faster than when I was out of the room. We went home late that night~I cried the entire hour ride home~watching the smoke stacks until they were no longer visible. As we walked in the door the phone ran~it was the NICU where she was at~things took a turn for the worst and she had been put on the ventilator. We had been given the number to call the NICU so the first thing in the morning we called to get updates which I have all written down and in her baby book. (some of her updates)
Oct. 30~9:00 am ~ holding stable
9:00 p.m. ~had turned down the vent. but not responding so turned back up
October 31~Halloween 9:00 am improving
1:00 pm~ visited~under oxygen hood~eating 2 ml every 4 hours through an iv that ran through her nose into her stomach. Under belli lights for jaundice
7:30 pm ~oxygen at 35% eating 2-3 ml every 4 hours
Nov. 1 9:00 am~removed umbilical iv~2-3 ml every 4 hours, oxygen at 30%
4:30 pm~visited oxygen at 29%~iv moved to the side of head
10:00 pm~jaundice level down~holding stable
Nov. 2 9:00 am~oxygen at 28%
4:00 pm~visited GOT TO HOLD!!!! oxygen at 27%
10:00 pm~holding stable
Nov. 3 8:00 am~off oxygen!! increased feeding to almost 1 ounce
6:00 pm~visited~under belli lights for jaundice~feeding 35 ml. every 3 hours weighs 6 pounds, 12 ounces~GOT TO HOLD~got a hat and 1 sock
Nov. 4 8:00 am~holding stable
12:00 noon~visited with my dad and Ann~came off belli lights~eating 47 ml by nipple feeding
7:30 pm~visited~Mom held
9:00 pm~ate 40 ml ~sleeping
Nov. 5 8:30 am~no more belli lights weights 6 pounds 13 ounces
5:00 pm~visited~at 51 ml by nipple fed by Mom, Mom changed dirty diaper~GOT TO HOLD!!
10:15 pm~at 55 ml by nipple~nose tube got removed~maybe moved to big crib
Nov. 6 8:30 am~ate good at feeding~still in same bed
2:30 pm~visited~at 65 ml by nipple~lost a little weight~still has 2 days of antibiotic
10:15 pm~at 75 ml. by nipple~maybe home Tuesday??
Nov. 7 8:30 am~60-70 ml feelings, lost 20 grams~moved to regular nursery!!
10:30 am~Dr. Little called~possibility of going home~ate 7 times yesterday~iv antibiotics done
3:00 pm~visited with my dad and Sam to see if going home~decided to stay longer to eat more regular~ate 51ml~fed by mom
8:30 pm~visited with husband~got to take to a room and hold and feed!!
Nov. 8 9:30 am~ Not able to go home today~not maintaining body temp.~put in a heating bed to stay warm
Nov. 9 8:30 am~ moved out of warming bed to regular bed~body temp normal~eating 60-70 ml at feeding~possibility of going home tomorrow
4:30 pm~visited with girls~got to take to room~fed by Mom~changed wet diaper
Nov. 10 10:00am~called to check normal stats and the nurse said she had been discharged~COME GET HER!!! Drove over with my dad and Sam and the girls (snow storm that day)
2:00 pm~visited Grandma Walters~went home for the first time!! <3
The day we went over to get her there was a huge snow storm~my dad had a large truck that he drove over very slowly~the roads were very slick. The hospital said she could stay longer but there was no way they were keeping her any longer than they needed!! The drive home took over 2 hours but it was with my 3 girls so time seemed to stand still int he first place. The first person we visited when we got back to Osage was my grandma~Grace was named after my Great Grandma Grace Bean so I thought it was only fitting for them to meet!! The next days after Grace came home were quite and we had a steady flow of visitors.
The next few months flew by~we did have a repeat ultrasound of her kidneys which turned out to be nothing to worry about!! The doctors in the NICU told us that Grace would need her hearing tested every 6 months for the first 3 years of her life because she was in the NICU for longer than most babies her age. There was a chance with her being on the ventilator damage could have been done to her ears. We went faithfully every 6 months and never had any issues. :)
When Grace was 4 months old she got sick with big people equivalent of the flu called RSV and was hospitalized for 2 days. :( again was a hard time seeing her so small and helpless~the iv's didn't take~her tiny veins would blow and they couldn't get them to stay in!! But she surprised them all and was a quick healer. It was also at a 4 month check up that I discovered that Grace would be a BIG SISTER!!! :0
Even though we have to what seems like Hell and back with Grace I would never change any moment of her past!! Having gone through all of it has made me love and cherish my family more than I ever knew possible. There is never any guarantee that everything will work out perfect~we can hope and pray and sometimes it does.
Today Grace is a healthy, happy almost 6 year old!! As her birthday approaches I dread the feelings it brings up but remember without all of those things we wouldn't be here now!! Grace is a very caring loving little girl~loves monkeys. The only possible side-affect we have seen is her speech~not sure if it's a connections~hard to tell but she has been working with a wonderful speech teacher for 2 years now and is going strong and improving every day!!
Patience is a virtue, virtue is a Grace, Grace is a little girl who wouldn't wash her face.
